Every day, I get an email with a Proverbs 31 devotional. Some days, they don’t really speak to me. But other days, they scream at me so loudly I can’t hear my own thoughts. A recent devotion did just that.
I’ve always dreamed about being a mom. As a young girl, I would play with my siblings and I was ALWAYS the mommy. I can remember having dolls and “feeding” them and changing their diapers. I’ve ALWAYS had a special place in my heart for children – and an extra special place for a child of my own.
That piece of my heart may physically be missing but the love I have for our child isn’t. I am COMPLETELY in love with a child I haven’t even met yet!
After our miscarriage and failed treatments and month after month of negative pregnancy tests, I would cry and get angry with God. I’d ask Him “Why?! Why are You saying NO to this dream? Why are You saying NO to easing this pain? Why are You saying NO to my prayers?”
The devotion I read this morning was titled “When God says No” and one sentence in particular convicted my heart.
“What if we believed that He was always saying yes – maybe not to what we are asking Him for right at that moment – but yes to His best.”
So many times, our reaction to not getting what we want is anger and frustration. We think that because we’re not getting what we want, that the person who’s denied our request is doing so just to be mean and spiteful.
A parent tells a child no when they ask if they can ride their bike on a busy street. Or no, they can’t have candy for breakfast. Or no, they can’t eat fast food for every meal.
Not because they want to be mean, but because they are saying yes to their best for the child out of protection.
A teacher tells a student no when they ask if they can rewrite a paper for a better grade. Or no, they can’t copy off the person sitting next to them. Or no, they can’t use someone else’s essay as their own.
Not because they want to be mean but because they are saying yes to the best learning experience.
God may have said no to having a biological child, but I’m learning He has not said no to being a parent. He is still blessing us. He is allowing us to be a blessing to others. Through sharing our journey. Through being a blessing to a child that may not have had a chance to thrive in another situation. Through learning things about ourselves that we may not have learned otherwise. Through strengthening our marriage in ways that may we may not have been able to through other trials.
So, instead of seeing the ways that God has said ‘no’, I’m choosing to see it as His way of saying ‘yes’ to other opportunities. Some days it’s harder than others, but His best is better than ours.
Can you do the same? Will you?